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Tuesday, September 4th 2018
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I maybe blonde but ... not a micro bikini girl


I placed an order recently from a high street store, bra & 2 pairs of panties

excited for delivery to arrive as thought the colour combination of peach & cream for pics/videos would be lovely

On opening parcel I checked out the bra/panties and then just about to fold up the packaging when noticed another item

A grey/white/yellow halter neck swimsuit ?
hmmm now, even after a couple of glasses of wine still not sure this would be on my list to buy ... i find halter neck ties tend to strangle me as they have to be tied so tight to take the weight of the boobs that its not comfortable

I was curious so did try it on, true to form tied tight around my neck but ...my word I can now imagine what a micro bikini could look like !

Couldn’t help myself and tried it on, a lot of jiggling and wiggling later, felt a little tight !

unfortunately it went back in the packaging to be returned

sometimes I have had great extra items arrive in deliveries ... read out the stationary order instead of water ! 5000 rubber bands, re chargeable batteries and a whole role of ‘this parcel is fragile’ tape

Until the next time

The sexist thing about a bikini is that it leaves something to the imagination, which is the best part
Saturday, August 25th 2018
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a picture speaks a thousand words ....
A throwback story not published, i was asked about funny anecdotes on a recent meet with a delightful septuagenarian
I recalled a delightful print I had at my first play apartment, a large framed well know black & white print of Audrey Hepburn, this was hung on a wall above the bed

many meets came and went, one gent liked to stand above me on the bed, towards the wall while he wanked

i could tell he was nearing by the bed wobbling and heavy breathing, I prepared my self for the inevitable but only heard a gasp and a ‘oops, oh f**k !

I looked up to see him staring at the wall and saw my poor print splattered with ... well you can guess ... a very impressive projectile shot over poor Audrey :(

I gently wiped her down, and all good, well a little smudgy in places !

years on ....

I have met many an international gent, and twice from Japan ... this gent was quite petite and appeared to enjoy bouncing about on the bed, in a frog like/sumo position and wanking ... when completed, and with blood rushing to to his head he wobbled over, steadying himself by putting hands on the wall, well actually ... you guessed it on my print of Audrey !

Another wipe up required

Third and final incident

Me, the husband and a photographer planned a Champagne shoot

this involves a bottle of shook up bubbly, my legs open and carefully placed fingers over the end of the said bottle to get the maximum spurt ! over me, open legs thus enabling husband to lick off

I was in position, a delightful pair of seamed nylons, basque and heels in the air ... the moment arrived ... awaiting for a spray of cold champagne ? a proportion shot over me but the husbands finger slipped ... (that old story lol) causing a spurt more of hosepipe dimension and said bubbly shot over me and you guessed it ...... all over my print !

me ? I didn’t mind as there was lots of licking up from said husband but as for poor Audrey Hepburn she was soaking wet, in fact dripping

.... I decided at this point it was time for Audrey to go, there are so many excuses to give why there are smear marks, sticky parts and blurring on the picture

until the next time

There comes a time in every woman's life when the only thing that helps is a glass of champagne. - Bette Davies
Friday, July 20th 2018
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Not just strawberries at Wimbledon!
Not just strawberries at Wimbledon!

Thought I would tell you about a naughty meet today with a delightful mature gent

Let me set the scene before arrival …

Bed all plumped, a couple of lamps on, window slightly open, chilled beach music playing, high-speed fan at the ready for those hot sticky moments

Plus cold refreshments in the fridge, still/sparkling water, orange juice, and my teapot at the ready for afternoon tea

And during the summer months an additional surprise of sliced strawberries to nibble as we play ….

When I say nibble as we play that is exactly what the said gentleman did ….
rub them gently over my breasts and large pussy lips …. And lick lick lick … so when we kissed he had strawberry lips too!


So if you fancy a fruity time over the summer please do call

Until the next time

Women are like fruits; everyone has their own unique colour, shape, aroma, and taste
Friday, June 29th 2018
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A to Z of Annabel
An A to Z of Annabel

A - Anna
B - busty, big boobs
C - cam shows
D - discreet
E - escort
F - full cup of boobs
G - girlfriend experience
H - 34h Cup bra
I - individual
J - JOI
K - kisses
L - London hotel meets
M - meets
N - naughty but nice
O - oral, covered
P - phonechats
Q - quintessentially English
R - rampant rabbit toy
S - Stansted
T - twitter
U - unique
V - vibrators
W - wanking
X - X rated
Y - young at heart
Z - zzzzzzzzz after a busy day

.... maybe you can create your own descriptive
words to describe me !

until the next time

sex appeal is 50% what you got
and 50% what people think you’ve got
Sophia Loren
Wednesday, June 20th 2018
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Taking a break .... from touring
Taking a break !

…. No not like the ‘break’ Ross took on Friends (for those who can remember this fantastic sitcom)

Having a break from touring !

Really, I hear you say, but why ?

it easy that one ….
two main reasons

UK Public transport and secondly a little more personal

Let me explain …..

…. Just some stats on travel….

Read a report from
The World economic 2017 travel and tourism report

We are ranked 11th ! 11 ! Really, you hear me say … only 11th and there are countries worse than the appalling trains/planes & buses than the UK ?

15th Spain
14th Barbados
13th Bahrain
12th Austria

Fair enough, Barbados & Bahrain I can understand but Spain’s buses are in my experience pretty reliable … well when I say reliable, they are invariably late but and a big but in there defence they are consistently late to the same time … be easier to change the time table for all journeys by 15 mins …

Go on guess the top one ?

Hong Kong !!

Having lived and worked there (albeit 1996/97, I can tell you there MTR (metro) worked amazingly well, the infamous Star Ferry not so, but got you across the South China Sea in a crowded chaotic cheap sight seeing way


Anyway I digress …. Back to me taking a break

I have toured at hotels throughout the UK, Europe and occasionally worldwide, almost every month for the last 10 years, unfortunately no medals 🎖 for a decade of service !

Touring is a logistical juggling act …you throw a lot of balls up in the air and hope you catch them all …. This includes, and in no particular order …. Booking hotels a year in advance to get the best rate, train & planes at least 3 months, advertising/marketing, deposit taking and finally try to pack everything everyone will ask for ! And not even left home at this point

The naughty and nice meets are always so much fun and with charming gents …. The travel, not so much in the UK anymore

The personal reason ….
Like to spend a little more time at home in central London
Have rented our the apartment off and on over many years while we both lived and worked worldwide we decided last year to completely refurbish on a grand scale …. Definitely a Kirstie Allsopp wall bringing down moment … trending with a wet room for husband and a bathroom with shower and hand held spray for me …. (by the way a key to a happy and long relationship is two bathrooms)

So the touring break is looking like 6 months, but in the meantime you can book
meets at my private apartment at Stansted
Outcalls to central London hotels
Individual meets at a hotel for you
London airport meets
Book camshows & phonechats
Buy items from my wardrobe


So ….
it’s not goodbye on tours just au revoir
I’ll be back … (Arnie S)

Until the next time

….. I never said it would be easy, I said it would be worth it
Wednesday, May 2nd 2018
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my best friend is a transgender woman

I have a new girl friend called Julie

That’s nothing unusual I hear you say,

only for the fact I have them known him for 30 years but only met her for the first time last week

…. now you're confused, let me explain …


My best long term male friend Harry (apart from the husband) transformed recently to be a woman


She is now Julie, a transgender woman


As I say I met her for the first time last week, we had arranged to meet for a day of coffees/lunch/shopping as we do often and even though I had been, confidentially party to the discussions of her transformation I had no idea I would be meeting her not him

Was it a shock you ask, yes it was - it’s not often I am speechless but for once I was !

Usually, we hug/kiss, like old friends do but there was a little personal space that had not been there before

I have to say the look was convincing, must have been practicing with the makeup & hair, not use to seeing bright colours nor bling on my friend

We went for a coffee, one thing that hadn’t changed was finding toilets, between us we can wee for England, did you know most high street coffee shops have unisex toilets?

We sat across from each other, I noticed the new delicate way she held her cup and took smaller bites from a pastry


We usually talked clothes, ‘he’ liked black, a Johnny Cash look, non collar shirts with waistcoats, a hippy style …. Julie was in a bright pink sweater, fitted jeans, ankle boots with a casual handbag - sat in the coffee shop she was not out of place and you wouldn’t give a second glance, in a nice way


We chatted, a little awkwardly at first, thinking about what I was going to say before I said it, and yes that’s another first for me - I wanted to use the correct pronouns, be understanding of her nervousness as well as mine and the new journey we were both undertaking


We walked to Tottenham Court Road, enjoying the sun, instantly I noticed one thing that hadn’t changed, Julie walked on the road side of the pavement as ‘Harry’ had always done .. Being brought up with manners ingrained, this was going to be to a hard one to change


Clothes shopping was an eye opener, no longer opportunities for me to check out what guys are buying, you know the one who’s out buying on his own, holds a Hawaiian shirt up and looks in the mirror, I catch his eye and shake my head, he smiles and puts the shirt back

….. now I find Julie and I are discussing and debating the merits of thongs or full panties eeek … could write a whole blog just on that subject … and something I don’t know the answer to ‘how to hide your package in a swimsuit’ … well actually I have two rather large packages on my chest but never had the debate of hiding them, in fact one might say they are out more than their in and definitely get into a room before me!


As the day goes so does the ease of conversation and find ourselves slipping into our old friendship with humorous quips/anecdotes - until I am looking up something on my phone, head bent, ask a question without looking up, a mans voice replies a familiar sarcastic humorous reply and for a split second I forget the days events, laughing inside and out at my friend Harry, and glance up expecting his 5 oclock shadow, his salt & pepper hair and sparkling eyes but see Julie, a giggly feminine blonde …. and remember Harry has gone


Yes, I am sad, sad I won’t have one more day with him, one more time to remember funny & sad moments, and to say goodbye …. bet your thinking would one day be enough … how many more days would I want and as a human being would always want more …


I need more time to grieve, to let my friend go and try, try very hard to welcome a new friend into my life and make new memories, plans, funny moments that we can look back on and laugh

It will happen, it will take time and that’s something we have as friends … we have time to start again, a new era for the both of us

But, you say, what about Julie? Forget you and your selfish thoughts … think about his life and her new one

I do and I am … I can’t imagine the tug of war of feelings he has had within himself, the suppression, the depression … the need to confirm and be who you were given

I can’t imagine that strength, that backbone to stand tall and be who you want to be … to ‘come out’ as the modern phrase is

I admire my old friend and congratulate my new friend on the guts to be Julie … to create a new you and stand up and be counted


So next time you see a transgender man or woman, don’t stare or gape, smile and think about the journey they have undertaken to get to be who they want to be, despite criticism, and the so called friends they will lose …


you and I have had a moderately easy ride in comparison … I’m not saying we haven’t had trials and tribulations along our road to adult hood but the pull of being not what you have been born must be a fight and a daily battle


It may not be my usual blog of the funny/bizarre and downright ridiculous situations in my world as an escort but it’s a little insight into my personal life and the experiences that effect me

I am Annabel …. the escort, the wife, the best friend and a fifties blonde who after many years in conformist roles became a sex worker
escort/whore/tart/prostitute …. No different than my new and exciting friend Julie

We all have labels it’s who we are inside that’s important

Until the next time

It’s not about being a new person, but becoming the person you were already
meant to be

By Anon
Monday, January 8th 2018
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a blonde in the dark ....
This one occurred in a hotel toilets!

after a journey from Edinburgh to Glasgow, I was rather crossed legged by the time arrived at my hotel and before checking in whizzed off to the ladies leaving luggage with my duo lady Catherine

sped in the cubicle so quick, not even time to think of taking a video clip of my wee
Ohhh such a relief, I sat just contemplating as you do, ensuring didn’t need to go again when everything went black

the lights had gone out, guessing it wasn’t a practical joke and just a light timer set just a little too efficiently on approximately 4 mins!

so first off in the dark with panties and tights around ankles decided standing up wasn’t ideal at least until I could find the flashlight on my phone ... not the easiest maneuver in the dark especially as the now new home button on my iPhone 7 Plus is almost flat against the screen

After fiddling for what seemed ages I located the bottom of the screen and it lit up enabling me to press flashlight!
finished getting dressed, unlocked the door

Yeah .... and then there was light

Until next time

a light at the end of a tunnel is a train!
Wednesday, December 27th 2017
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.... is that you on a dating site ?
.... before you think it’s just another winge about stolen pics ... it’s not :)

I recently had enquiries from gents saying they had written to me on a site they had seen my photos on and I had not replied ?
hmmm that’s definitely not like me unless it’s a crewd/rude reply, and your asking for things I don’t offer

I asked which site, they both said POF
hmmm ... bemused face, wrinkled forehead and racking mental rolodex ( if you don’t know what one was your definitely too young for me)
I have come to realise a handful of new sites do ‘borrow’ my info & pics to boost there members, not saying I am that important or well known but over 50,000 followers on twitter must mean something, right ?

‘POF’ i replied
yes, one wrote, you know the free app Plenty of fish

plenty of fish ? really ?
(what I wanted to say is do look desperate but decided against it as they could be potential clients)

Oh that free dating site ? no that’s no me, I don’t advertise on those sites
i guess my photos have been used on a profile

I could feel the dejection in text

your not looking for a date then ?

hmmm I said ‘no, I charge by the hour’

I asked if you would screenshot the profile, he did

Tracey
Looking for love
(with a selection of my recent profile pics plus a selfie from twitter where my husband had been chopped out !)
45, blonde 5ft 8, size 12, loves travel, dancing, rollercoaster rides, sushi & skiing
first date ? let’s go to a fondue restaurant and then take an open topped bus tour


Oh my, where do I start

1. complimented on the age
2. I’ve increased an inch in height
3. agree fully with first 2 likes
4. I would have to be comatose to go on a fairground ride, husband tried it twice ... and just saying it didn’t end well
5. Sushi ? I don’t understand eating raw anything :(
6. Skiing ? oh where do I start .... wrapped up in enough padding to enter a sumo wrestling competition, get cold & wet & then drink ridiculous amounts of alcohol at ridiculous altitude, attach massive boards to your feet and think you look cool ... I could go on and on .. yes I have been twice and much preferred the apres ski sat in a hot tub with a glass of bubbly
7. .... but credit it where it’s due the first date option I would love ... note to ones self to do with husband

I digress, back to the two disappointed gents and an update for
I scored a 50% hit, one booked me for a dinner date and guessing he enjoyed it as seen him twice since

the moral of the story is not everything is as it seems and if it seems to good to be true ... it often is :)

update
I wrote to POF no reply, a client had a great idea, set a profile up, using some of the same pics and brand new ones, in the strap line write
‘Isn’t it great POF let me advertise as an escort’
in the about me section mention you do duos with the said ‘Tracy’
not forgetting to put all your link to adultwork
..... within a day my profile and hers had been deleted ! result

until the next time
for women, the best aphrodisiacs are words. The G-spot is in the ears. He who looks for it below there is wasting his time


Monday, November 27th 2017
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Don’t you just love a euphemism
‘the painters are in !’

a funny incident happened at my South Doncaster private apartment last week ...
So up early getting ready for a meet and could hear some music at a distance ... I checked my phones, the radio but no sounds and was by front door and realised it was coming from the corridor
On unlocking and opening the door I see big sheets covering the carpet, paint tins and areas of walls covered with masking tape and radio 1 blaring out
Just then spotted Mr decorator
‘Ah ‘ I said ‘what a surprise, here all day ?’
‘all week got 3 floors to do love’ he said
‘Oh ok, thanks’ hmmm this could be fun I thought, as got a couple of meets today
So the morning progressed with calls/confirmations and webcam shows all to sounds of an eclectic mix of music
my first gent text to say he would be on time, I replied and added
‘Just to update you I only found out this morning the painters are in, but we can still go ahead, look forward to seeing you’
after pressing send within a minute I got a reply
‘Oh I see, that’s unfortunate, is it tricky to get around & can we just do what we did before ?’ he said
‘ yes ...of course, the time is yours and can do whatever pushes your buttons - and for it being tricky with the painters in, it’s just a question of being with purpose, no need to interact with them, after all they don’t know what who or why your visiting’
a very speedy reply
‘Oh my Anna ... think we have been at cross purposes for the last few texts .... I thought when you said the ‘painters are in’ it was a euphemism for time of the month, to be fair it did surprise me as your 51 but then just realised you actually meant the decorators are in the building’

I wish you could have seen my face when I read this last text ... how embarrassingly funny

.... the only artistic licence going on in my apartment would be my efforts at a sexy striptease ... (and too see that particular movie you can peak at my naughty videos on my many sites)

Until the next time
All art is erotic
(Gustav Klimt
Friday, October 27th 2017
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being paid to play !
scrolling through news bulletins and other related tabs on google i came across an job advert for an online adult toy store

I don't recall an official title however the job description went something like this

Job detail

* part time, flexible hours, hands on & broad minded

* to have creative writing skills, capturing the buyers imagination with a witty repartee
* write detailed honest online reviews of toys
* to upload review videos with toy in hand, one assumes they meant to discuss only & holding toy in hand, with clothes on !
* to reply to review comments in a constructive manner

Type of person

* Outgoing, jolly, sense of humour
* honest, tells it how it is and the pro's & con's of each item

So, sat on a long train journey I decided to apply and fill the online form in, here is what I wrote

'I wish to apply for the position advertised - Adult online female toy reviewer & tester

whilst I appreciate you may have a particular type of person in mind, may I take this opportunity to see if your company is prepared to think 'outside of the proverbial box'
... and pardon my use of the word 'box' it was not intended as a pun !

Let me be frank with you, if I may, I work in the adult industry and wear 2 'hats' so to speak... firstly as an female mature escort and also provide webcam shows ... both using sex toys, on & in me & sometimes on a gent
so I can say with certainly I have had ‘hands on’ experience

Maybe I could send a sample video of me reviewing my recent toy purchase, I would imagine around the 1 minute time ... as wouldn’t want to peek too early or get to the point to prematurely but keeping the interest of the potential buyer on the edge, of their seat is paramount & interested enough to press the buy now button

Thank you for taking the time
to read my somewhat unusual application .... here’s crossing my fingers/toes and anything else that you reply

*****Update .... so far not had a response but then maybe it’s all too soon for escorts to be seen as professional business people .... I think it’s coming, so to speak but then all good things come to those who wait

Until the next time

Keep calm and use sex toys
Friday, September 15th 2017
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Sexy phone chat, while waiting for breakdown truck
With technology at our finger tips more so today than ever, we very rarely have nothing to do, especially if we have to sit and wait ... we may google bizarre questions, check our emails, take a few selfies, book a holiday
but you may do what a naughty gent did when his car broke down and he was waiting for recovery services ....
He paid for a naughty chat & had a wank !
... he even took a selfie sat at the side of the road with his cock in hand!

I said
'hope you have joined a road side recovery company ?'

he said
'I have member(ship) and it's members only lol
... you see what he did there ? member (term for cock) ship ... ! 😜

I was going to set a competition for the most bizarre place to have a naughty phonechat but think best not :(

Until the next time
Sex is more fun than cars but cars refuel quicker than men.
Germaine Greer


Saturday, August 19th 2017
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Anna washing new condoms !
I maybe blonde but ... why was I washing new packets of condoms ?

.... you may very well ask why I was upto my elbows in soapy suds washing new packets of condoms ... and no I am not that OCD i need to clean them before use

so ... been on a busy Scotland tour to Glasgow with Catherine, had a bit of rush checking out of hotel to catch train to London

Arrived home, and while yummy meal is cooking, pour self glass of wine and unpack ... always do it straight away then it's done ... sipping wine with one hand and reached to toiletry back, unzipped and grasped items in there ...

Oh yuk ... all I could feel was a sticky substance ... lifting my clenched hand out all I could see was shiny sticky lube !
In my rush I had forgotten to click lid on ky jelly tube and now it had leaked all over condom packets/mini toys/scissors

With a bowl of hot soapy water I entered all items in and began the task of washing the lube off, popped sticky gooey bag in washing machine, dried all packets of condoms and put in another clean bag

Now all new, very clean and sparkling condom packets

you could say .... what a scrubber lol

Until the next time
You don't get anything clean without getting something else dirty
Cecil Baxter


Thursday, August 10th 2017
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its a tall order in Amsterdam
I recently stayed at a modern trendy hotel in central Amsterdam -
I have lived and worked in the Netherlands, and found the locals friendly, open minded and you may think a somewhat obscure comment but in the main tall people - and found when purchasing items such as trousers & beds, not necessarily at the same time, they have a more extensive lengthier range ...
helps with my husband being 6ft 4

I thought to be 5ft 7 I am on the taller than average size but obviously not for Amsterdam hotel room doors

..... a knock at the door, I headed across and expected to come eye to eye with a spy hole but instead saw wood, I looked lower and then glanced up and saw it positioned a good 8 inches above my head?
I did jump just to see if I could see through it but was nowhere near,
although nearly knocked my self out as boobs hit my chin lol ...
then opened the door ...

luckily no axe murderer only housekeeping with complimentary water & biscuits

So the question is who did they use to gauge the postion of said spy hole? obviously a tall Dutch person :)

Until the next time
If you aren't in over your head, how do you know how tall you are?
T. S. Eliot



Thursday, June 8th 2017
Previous Entry 
Masturbation breaks at work ....
I tweeted an article some time ago about 'masturbation breaks at work'

There are several breaks available in the workplace …. Cigarettes breaks, religious breaks, time out breaks, tea breaks

so natural progression for breaks that relax us … got to be much improved than the mid-afternoon sugar rush of a chocolate bar ... Plus arm exercise for 'bingo wings' arms ! … gets your heart beat up … all good for BMI, so less resources on an already overstretched NHS

So guess the next question is how and where

A good use of those awkward shaped no window office that no one wants …
Diary … coded letters system?
Engaged/free slider on the door
Lit up traffic light buttons … green, amber, red
Definitely not in the toilets at work … or in the stationary cupboard… heard of some nasty injuries with staplers and superglue! that's a time for another blog
…. And final idea …definitely not in a glass lift!

So know we are all relaxed at work … it must be nearly time to go home :)

Until the next time

The good thing about masturbation is that you don’t have to dress up for it.
—Truman Capote





  

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