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 1062 entries, showing page 13 of 76 
Friday, April 19th 2019
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NEWCASTLE: Thank you for having me!
It has been a thoroughly enjoyable debut to one of my favourite cities on this plane. Only the vaguely woke will understand. Sheeple, not so much but not judging.


VIP Apartment is going to be getting a full review for this outstanding shag pad he has kindly provided. I've left a few bits to make it even more enjoyable


There is only so much excitement this (very) little old lady can take so today I will be bouncing around on cam before getting ready to toddle off to violate the MANCHESTER boys on Saturday for a week.

It has been years since I went on my Manchester Molestation Mission and so long overdue!


I won't have as much free time as I would like on this occasion as I have to squeeze my civilian work in which is the reason for visiting in the first place, although sure does not feel like it!
Saturday, April 13th 2019
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KDB >> Aalreet, Newcastle! It's been a while!
Approximately 30 years to be exact

Between wandering around aimlessly wondering where this beloved city has gone, THE nicest guys have been providing much entertainment.

My first visitor - Ray - arrived not only with bubbles, but TWO separate home cooked dishes, BOTH keto friendly!

Often visitors at the beginning of my tour return prior to departure for a final round which is just wonderful.

My view over the Life Centre with some of the most beautiful antiquitech is complemented by the spacious, bright and airy apartment hosted by our very own VIP Apartments.

Once I have checked out there will be a review coming his way. A complete juxtaposition with the low life swindling thief in Kings Cross who has since been banned from the site.

Thursday, April 11th 2019
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The Empty CUNT & Pasters
Having a profile as distinctive as mine comes with the down side of having all the mindless numpties bereft of an ounce of creativity stoop to steal others' intellectual property.

It rarely takes long before someone notices & gives me the heads up *thanks Holly! *Thanks Mr. Curious!*. Followed by the tit getting reported to AW & them taking them out of service while they fix their shit


The silly thing is, my unique answers range from sublime to ridiculous so it's not tricky to work out their origins.

Ultimately, it will take more than a morning of copying & pasting to improve any chances of similar success because the cream always rises to the top and besides, there is more where that came from, bitch!
Sunday, March 24th 2019
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"You're so TINY!"
GUILTY! And happily so!

The genetics were good to me & I was built for speed rather than comfort, although that can taper down to a light jog later in the evening hence the lack of availability post 8pm!


I can't remember the time when someone did not exclaim "but you're TINY!" upon meeting me for the first time.

As though some kind of tall tinkering had taken place on the photos which show very clearly the diminutive dimensions of this lithe form. Nope, it's just all perfectly proportioned and photogenic as fuck.


Whilst I am evidently most unsuitable for those who require a more androgynous, amazonian build. Those who hanker for a petite, feminine form will be in pocket rocket heaven.

I absolutely adore being fun sized and what fun it is too!
Saturday, March 23rd 2019
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Ever The Early Bird Fuelled With Fabulousness!
The astounded proclamations of "You're up early!" when bouncing around on cam even at 9am when I've been up for hours!

Bookings prior to midday need to be booked the night before otherwise I won't be at the pad where I rock up about that time.


You are be forgiven for thinking I'm a spring chicken by looking at the photos alone but nothing could be further from the truth and this Vintage Bintage likes to finish similarly early around 7pm heading off home to unwind and prepare the the craziness of the next day with a solid night's sleep.

The hours before midnight are most restorative and I like getting my money's worth to hit the ground running the next morning, bouncing out of bed raring to go!


The body is so clever but needs us to treat it with respect to get the best out of it.

Similarly, how we eat hugely impacts on well fucking everything so on that side note, ditching the energy sapping empty anti-nutrients in favour of fewer, nutrient & energy dense meals will keep mind & body together far better than caffeine & energy drinks all day long. That shit is just not sustainable as you may have discovered with less than stellar energy levels etc.
Friday, March 22nd 2019
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Blimey Bayswater & Flats to let
What an insane week it has been in beautiful Bayswater!

Slightly less kinky than usual and much more reserved on the 'hole', I am just packing up the last of my things before scooting back to one of my favourite locations: HEATHROW a bit later.

It's been an interesting week and my beautiful apartment was enjoyed by many; I will be sad to leave it behind.

It will be interesting to ply my trade from a hotel for a change as I usually do apartments which I have to myself.

Speaking of flats, I had a nasty experience with one of the flats to let on here but the profile seems to have vanished. 'Sincere'? it anything but. Oh the irony!

Coincidence?
Tuesday, February 5th 2019
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On The Move Again!
Every so often I get the craving for a totally different set up and MO. Like now...

And I do mean, SO often, as anyone who has kept up to speed with my blogs will note!


Being in one place is great but I need to get out and about in the world cunt-ry a bit more, so have a Northern tour all lined up for April at the moment and am having fun planning new sex adventures up and down the place.

Keep your eyes peeled for my ever changing location hopefully see you soon!

Saturday, February 2nd 2019
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Fingers and Pies
No, not those pies, you filthbag!

This little part time gig offers the opportunity to spread my varied talents across a plethora of specialties, from voiceover acting projects to fitness instruction and health coaching.


A good work balance is essential for a happy life and variety is indeed one of the infinite spices of life.

As much as I love (100% cacao) chocolate, I wouldn't want to eat it to the exclusion of everything else!


Thursday, January 24th 2019
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An Old Poem
So Mr Saggy Bangers (mine, not his) makes it to the blog twice in as many weeks, with this old sonnet:


So, I find myself in Holborn, thought of you and an old poem popped into my mind:

When I am blue and lonesome
When I think all hope has gone
When I walk along High Holborn
I think of you with no clothes on

- Mr Saggy Bangers

Fucking beautiful.
Tuesday, January 22nd 2019
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2019 Deposit System Working Like a Dream!
One of those charms that keep away pests and let only authenticity pass through, that is!

After one wild goose chase too many & extensive prep for a no show one day, it was decided that was the one time too many and so a deposit system came to be under certain circumstances.


A bit like the notoriously shady credit scoring of the criminals up the food chain more commonly known as banks, not all reasons are disclosed in order to retain efficiency of the system.

In true duality terms, this also means that those who book over 24 hours in advance and mention the Early Bird Discount also receive £20 off their booking when mentioned in their booking request; almost 10% off. Needless to say, it has been popular to say the least!


Occasionally I am already at the boudoir and no such faff will be necessary, but this is rare.

The genuine clients have zero problemo sending a nominal top up or amazon voucher which is more than can be said of potential time wasters who seem to skulk back to their low vibrational pit of malevolence.
Monday, January 21st 2019
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Bum Glove and Gaping
Sammy paid me a visit for the first time in AGGEEEESSSSS!

*waves* HI SAMMYSNAKE!


I had quite forgotten a) how fucking organised he is, bringing some super slippery J-lube already pre-mixed and b) super absorbent pads, the like of which is used in my world, for doing enemas in hotels!

Not that he needed them of course, he was clean as a whistle. A very deep whistle which is very wide and accommodating of BOTH hands.


It wasn't until after the event that I stumbled across the long gauntlets which are normally used for such invasive procedures, but given his scrupulous preparations it wasn't an issue in the slightest. More of a smidge of potential inconvenience at worst, really.

I do love these extended anal exploration missions and am not particularly adverse to being on the receiving end, hand size notwithstanding!
Wednesday, January 16th 2019
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A Woman's Perogative
To change Her mind, as pop culture would have you believe.

Well for once I will go with that and just disregard latent misandrist undertones for a moment, because it suits.

I fucking love my age whatever it is because I always have a fucking ball, not giving too many fucks about this that or t'other.

Dipping over 10 years under my age might be pushing it a bit far I thought, but not according to my visitors.

Until they see those saggy 40-something bangers of course!

Saying that, Peter just left and couldn't keep his fucking hands off those sensitive spaniel's ears!

The streamlined A cups are struggling to keep up with such enthusiasm after they were downsized from FF's a few years ago.

They deflated a fair bit then too, as you can imagine, but they bounced back surprisingly well.

This time the struggle is real and autophagy seems to be taking it's time rather but it's a trade off for the rest of the chassis looking 'lithe' as b4d_h4bit just commented now on cam - thanks babe!

The ever increasing lifestyle optimisation contines to slow the clock physiologically so were I more decisive I may be able to stick to an age and just wind the clock back every year but no.

I like grabbing the attentions of those looking for 30-something as well as the man who likes even more experience of a 40-something under the ever decreasing belt
Monday, January 14th 2019
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Watch Out Naughty Northern Boys! You're MINE!
The Big Fat KDB Tour is shaping up nicely!

Apartments (not hotels) are booked & deposits paid, even got one of the train tickets.


Compulsion with details has my ever growing To Do list practically packing over 3 months ahead of time!

The Big Bastard Tumi which I literally can get into, is standing by. Fuck maybe I should have flown?


Nah, I don’t trust ground staff with this thing worth more than its contents…

As ex crew (with the AUTHENTIC uniform to match; more on that another day) I know precisely how our valuables are manhandled.


Which brings me nicely to my impending visit oop North!

Already had a few guys tentatively touching base to make sure they were not dreaming and indeed I am venturing to the North East and North West.


Only want to use the local cock for a couple of weeks then you can have them back to do as you wish.

There is so much to do on my visit, it will be great to catch up with some long lost buddies and venture out with some new ones too!

Wednesday, January 9th 2019
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KDB + KDD = Princesses of Piss
This is an excerpt sent to the client of another upcoming booking with what is fast becoming my Partner in Piss Miss KDD.

Maybe you missed my auto uropathy blog and my lifestyle choices with piss which is not solely a fetish interest. I use it in my daily enemas, neti pot, eye bath & when not immediately preceding a client, use my own piss with which to bathe.


I have drank Kristen's pee on a number of occasions over the years as she has mine. It's amazing for the skin and I can also piss while taking anal, as well as piss standing up, aim & fire whilst standing, piss into my own mouth, the lot! My bladder knows nothing of shyness, indeed, has zero fucks to give and the concept of stage fright has not occurred.

So my darling, you can see that WS is indeed very much my thing!


Seriously, that shit piss is SOOO good for the hair and well, you can see the superlative state of my own impeccable visage

After spending a few months last year 'looping' my piss (hate waste), I discovered that when it is recycled it hydrates so much quicker which is absolutely perfect for a demanding watersports fuck fest!


KDD + KDB...

P.
I.
S.
S.
I.
N.
G.

  

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