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| Wednesday, September 17th 2014 |
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| Selfies, professional pictures and photoshop |
When I first started escorting, professional pictures was the norm together with a website.
When in a studio, the lighting is so harsh which means every little blemish will show, so there is no choice but to have the pictures photo shopped to counteract this. Photoshopping can be overdone though, so it is a dilemma of what is best.
I wanted to put up some amateur pictures (and have some up) but with a mobile phone, the quality just does not cut it. So I have finally invested in a good camera and will post selfies more regularly.
Enjoy xx |
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| Wednesday, August 6th 2014 |
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| Taste of London |
Visited Taste of London for the first time this year in Regents Park. What a wonderful event this is, if you are a foodie it comes highly recommended. I was so impressed by the whole set up, that future visits are an absolute must. There were 40 highly ranked restaurants giving you an opportunity to sample their dishes, star chefs, demonstrations and lots of promotion stalls with freebies.
Sushisamba had a stall there, a restaurant I have always been curious about as I love Sushi and anything Japanese and they mix Japanese, Brazilian and Peruvian cuisine. I had a wasa roll with shrimp tempura, quinoa, coriander, chorizo, spicy mayo and red onion. I really was not that impressed but it was an interesting combination. If they are back again in the future, I may try something else.
The best dish we tried was no doubt at Flesh and Buns where we had roasted pork belly, mustard miso and pickled green apple in a steamed bun. It was sooo good!
Also tried the winning dessert of the festival created by Andre Garrett at Cliveden house, which was the Peanut butter parfait, salted caramel and raspberry. Lovely flavours but quite rich.
Had so many freebies going around that we ended a wonderful sunny evening feeling very full.
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| Tuesday, July 29th 2014 |
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| Ukash and Poker |
I pay for some of my advertising by Ukash vouchers as it is easier. When purchasing a voucher you have to specify if this relates to over or under 18 years of age. So there I am asking for £30 worth over 18 and the owner of the news agents goes ‘Gambling?’. I could hardly say ‘no, actually, I am an escort and this is for my advertising’ So the answer was ‘yes’. He replied ‘Poker?’ I answered ‘yes’.. He then goes ‘which sites do you use?’
You know when you just think ‘Oh shoot, what did I just get myself into’! My face must have been amusing. Thankfully he said ‘I use PKR’ whereby I could only answer ‘So do I, So do I!’ And I then asked him if he ever wins whereby he replied ‘yes, here and there’
Made my day, I am now a Poker player. Who would have thought! I shall go and look at manuals on how to play poker. |
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| Tuesday, January 14th 2014 |
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| Sinusitus, ear plugs, rabbits and memory lane |
Sinusitis hurts!
Flying into Dublin a couple of weeks ago, I was comfortably dozing off only to be woken by what felt like hundreds of needles being inserted into my forehead when the plane started descending. I have never had any problems with flying before so did worry a bit after. Apparently, sinusitus according to a doctor client of mine.. But just ouch ouch on the pain, a completely new experience!
Worried flying back again to England and had strict instructions to take aspirin, paracetemol and insert ear plugs when about to descend. As we were taxiing on the approach to the runway I saw lots of movement. All rabbits running around on the actual runway, ideally because they were playing nicely with each other in my mind :) (but they could of course have been males trying to beat each other up for the females attention!)
Aspirin and paracetamol taken and on descend inserted ear plugs.. Amazing how quiet it gets! First time trying ear plugs. But no pain so just yay on the advice.
And a picture from one of my very first photo shoots, brings back memories and bum is still as big (also known as le big buttocuks) |
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| Wednesday, December 4th 2013 |
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| Am I a Foodie in Belfast! Oh yes! |
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I love good food and am very likely to purr like a Cheshire cat if I am served a spectacular meal. Cue Belfast on my first tour. At the end of a busy weekend and with a couple of hours to spare, I had spotted a little bistro called 'Deanes Deli' which seemed to attract all the local business people which is always a good sign. So in I went and ordered a three course lunch.. Goats Cheese Fritters with an onion marmelade to start, Pork Belly with Mash and gravy and finished off with a Pear and Apple crumble with a sea salted caramel ice cream. It was simply perfect from start to finish and what made it even better was that the main course was served by a (obviously having had a drink or more the night before) waiter, who put down the plate and said 'enjoy your meal miss' with a big smile with some missing teeth. Life just does not get better than this! |
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| Wednesday, October 2nd 2013 |
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| New pictures at last. |
Hellooo!
I have not escorted a great deal the past three years hence no new pictures for some time..
As I appreciate many clients like to see both professional and amateur pictures (untouched) I will aim to put up a regular amateur picture here and there to go with the professional set.. First amateur one was taken with Nicola - pure cream a few weeks ago. I will also put up a couple of the professional ones before they were touched up over the next few weeks.
As well as being in Bedford and Hemel Hempstead I am going to be doing a bit of touring, so watch out for me!
Look forward to meeting you :)
Pia xx |
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| Saturday, November 13th 2010 |
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| Client Etiquette |
Clients often ask about the correct Client Etiquette. [Courtesy of Sasfan a very talented Chinese Delivery Driver] :-)
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Personal hygiene:-
Despite protestations to the contrary, what the lady wants is the smell of a REAL man, that earthy pong of honest sweat. You may be offered the use of bathing facilities, do not fall for this, it is a well known ploy to test your suitability as a regular (accept and you may never return), just ignore it, whip your todger out and say the magic words "get yer larfin gear round that then gal!!", it works every time.
Services:-
Most if not all ladies are rather shy and retiring, in so many ways they are like delicate flowers that need to be gently and repeatedly questioned before they finally open up and reveal their innermost feelings and desires, hence the need to totally disregard any form of limitations in the area of services provided, they ALL supply, and indeed crave, ALL forms of sexual activity, don’t be put off by a list of "don'ts" because the implication behind that list is "well I do, but don't tell anybody".
Payment:-
Although this part of the deal is of the least interest to the lady (it's just pandering to tradition really) it needs dealing with in a business like manner. I expect that you have seen a couple (almost a rarity these days) of adverts that state that payment is to be in "cash only", well to be frank these ladies are a little bit behind the times, there are major disadvantages to cash and your refusal to use it will be appreciated enormously once you explain the advantages of the cheque.
1. No more embarrassing moments when the lady discovers that she is £20 short
2. No more embarrassing moments when the lady discovers that you have overpaid by £20
3. The dud note problem is eliminated
4. No more having to keep an accurate count of income for tax purposes, just pay it in to the bank account and let the accountant do the rest
The list is endless, the lady will be indebted to you for life.
Security:-
Obviously the security of the lady is paramount but "what about my security on an incall?" I hear you ask, a very good point and very well made say I, have no fears on that score because the punting fraternity have already got that one fully sussed out. All ladies that do incall are now legally required to have an arrangement with their Neighbourhood Watch Committee, so before you set out just take a note of their number and when you are ensconced inside the dwelling just give them a quick bell and inform them of the Lady's name, address and mobile number and the duration of your stay, a 2 minute call and you're all done and dusted.
Advertising:-
This is a very expensive and sensitive area for a lady, getting just that right balance of titillation without straying into the vulgar can be quite a soul-searching task, you can be of great assistance here, by following all the previous guidelines you will soon find the lady of your dreams and quickly become a regular, so why not be really helpful and give her some free advertising, get a T shirt made up using the following template.
LILY OF LEYTONSTONE TAKES IT UP THE BACKSIDE (with her mobile number of course).
Wear that every day and she will shower you (golden if that is your preference) with praise and be your soul mate for life.
Initial contact:-
I believe that I have already posted information on this subject but I shall incorporate it just for the sake of completeness. This is a much forgotten, misunderstood yet so important feature of punting; as in most things in life first impressions are the ones that stick, they are the very bedrock that will support and nurture future appointments, so get it right. I shall endeavour to cover the two main methods of initial contact and give as many tips as possible, however you will have your own style so treat the following as a guide only and not something to be slavishly followed :-
Email
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The lady logs on and views her inbox, she has 2 Emails, one has a subject of "I would like to arrange an incall appointment" the other has a subject of "r u up 4 it or wot", bit of a no-brainer really. The first is very likely to be from some lily-livered wimp called Tarquin wanting to make a booking for a 3 hour "mutual enjoyment experience", the chances are that the lady will delete that without bothering to open it, whereas the second one will really catch her eye, she will know from experience that inside will be the promise of an hour of good hard shagging by a real man.
Make the body of the Email short, sharp and preferably explicit, don't hint at things you want, be open and upfront, the lady does not want to have to read between the lines or look for subtext, after all what she desires above everything else is an assertive male that knows what he wants and gets it, phrases like "I would like to indulge in a little tradesmans entrance play" is for the Tarquin's of this world and just will not cut the mustard with a WG, be bold and write "your backside will make the Mersey Tunnel look like a drinking straw when I'm done with you", this is what excites the lady, this is what gets her going, you really can't go wrong with this sort of approach.
Phone
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Picture if you can the following scene, it is 3 O'clock in the afternoon and the lady is reading "Bleak House" or working on her needlepoint, as an aside I think this is an appropriate place to dispel a widely held misconception, WG's do not have a "normal" life outside of working, they are on call 24/7, it is not work that they do it is a vocation, her biological clock is in perfect harmony with your sexual desires; they are always dressed in erotic lingerie and will respond well to repeated enquiries as to what they are wearing, but I digress.
The phone rings, the lady answers and hears :-
"Hello Thelma, my name is Tarquin, I wonder if you would be available this afternoon .........."
Not unsurprisingly all he will hear (if he is lucky) is a loud "click"
An alternative to the above is, the phone rings, the lady answers and hears :-
"Get your tits out, get your tits out, get your tits out for the lads ............. Wot u wearin' then?"
Instant rapport, the lady will be overcome with excitement, you've pulled, I rest my case. |
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| Wednesday, August 26th 2009 |
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| A day in the life of Pia |
So as everybody else seems to be doing blogs these days I thought I better do one too.. I will try and write once in a while on my thoughts of life and escorting in general.
But for starters I will include a day in the life of Pia.
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Got up early, sorted out drop offs and went back to bed for one hour at 9am (I know, it is a cool job )
Drove to flat for appointment at 11am.
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Appointment 1.
C1 is a regular client who brings a first world war nurse's uniform, I wear it, dap his forehead with a cold tissue, shave his hair off below and then finish with a hand job.. The conversation today went:
C1 is lying naked on the bed whilst I am cutting off the excess hair first with the scissors..
C1: I went to a private clinic last week to get a quotation for having my man boobs removed.
Me: WHAT!!! What are you talking about, are you crazy, you have not got man boobs!!
C1: I do, that is why I can't get any girls.
Me: No, believe me, your chest is normal and I should know, I would not like to estimate the amount of man chests I have seen in my time escorting.. And a woman has got no interest in how your chest looks like, seriously you are talking crazy talk here!!! I would say that you are bordering on having 'OCD' (obsessive compulsive disorder) listen I think it is better if you learn to appreciate yourself as you are.. There is therapy or even some medicine you can get to help you..
C1: So you are saying I should take drugs? Drugs are bad for you, there is too much of a drug culture out there.
Me: No I am not talking about drugs but medicine..
C1: Yes and then they will section me and put me in a mental home..!!
Me: See what I mean about having OCD, your mind is already going way out of the way thinking much further thoughts than the average person would..
Anyway, session continued to a satisfactory outcome, as he was leaving he said 'I am having my man boobs done' I shouted back as he left 'You are crazy!!'
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Appointment 2.
New client. Seemed nice and a gentleman..
Undressed him and got him onto the bed, started a bj and was lingering there..
C2: I hope you don't mind but I just like to lie back and enjoy it not doing a thing.
Me: Hey, feel free, I am here to offer a service.
C2: Can I cum in your mouth?
Me: No..
C2: Ok, come on up here, lie next to me and gently give me a wank whilst kissing me.
Kissing gently whilst playing.
C2: Can you tell me how wonderful I am and that you love me.
Me: (giggles) I have only just met you, a bit soon isn't it?
C2: Can you pretend?
Me: You are wonderful, I love you.
C2: You could at least say it like you mean it!!
Me: Lol, I know, it is difficult.
Me: I loooove you mon cheriiieee, you are soooo wonderful..
Satisfactory outcome , yay!
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Appointment 3.
My twice a week regular..
No talk, I just put my bum in the air and he does the deed..
He texts me on the way home saying he is off to Divine, it was crap and he needs to go somewhere else. (By the way, as I have posted this in another place and many took it seriously, it is a joke.. He loves me really ;-) )
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Appointment 4.
A new client, a gentle lovely man who had an accident 12 years ago so nothing works anymore.. Just had a lovely hour of intimacy, talk and cuddles..
Through the day also got 2 texts which got ignored, one said 'Are you single Darling' and the other 'Wanna make love Babe'
So out of 4 appointments today, I only had sex with one though that is not always a typical day though not uncommon..
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** Nobody was harmed, identified or got upset by me writing this. They were all aware of it and ok with it :-)
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| Wednesday, August 26th 2009 |
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| You know you are a WG/Punter when.. |
.....You go to a nightclub and see a man arrive with 2 stunning women who then proceeds to start kissing each other on the dance floor with every guy in the place feeling jealous of the lucky guy.. You know you are a WG because it takes one to spot one (two in this case!!)
.....You know you are a WG when it never seems to bother you throwing your lingerie across the room anymore.. Here is to the days of taking it off under the covers (pre-WG days )
.....Whenever you see a beautiful girl/lady and you wonder if or hope she is an escort and how much her hourly rate is.
.....When in restaurants you look around and see if you can spot an escort/client combination at another table.
.....When a friend says "I'm going punting in Cambridge this weekend" and wonders why you suddenly choke on your drink!
.....When you go on a package holiday and have your fingers crossed that the free watersports is actually snorkling or windsurfing.
.....When O - levels and A - levels are talked about and you are not thinking of history or English Literature!!
.....When you are always in superdrug buying condoms lube and baby wipes and the cashiers look at you weird.
.....When a woman smiles at you on the tube and you give her a fiver
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For more blogs, click here...
Link to this blog using: http://blogs.adultwork.com/Pia%2D or http://blogs.adultwork.com/793714 or 
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| Professional older picture |
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| Ooh er. What is under the shirt. |
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| Does my bum look big in this? Yup! |
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| One of my favourite pictures. |
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| What is your ethnicity? |
Caucasian (White) |
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| What is the colour of your eyes? |
Blue |
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| What is the colour of your hair? |
Blonde |
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| What length is your hair? |
Shoulder length |
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| How tall are you? |
5'5" |
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| What is your shoe size? |
4.5 |
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| What is your dress size? |
14 |
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| What is your bra cup-size? |
B |
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| What times are you always available? |
See profile |
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| Will you do overnight bookings? |
No |
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